The Invisible Box

JULY 6TH, 2023

A Box (n.) a container with limited volume to store things; metaphorically, a box represents societal perceptions and expectations of a human.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but most people are quite familiar with the terms: ‘living inside the box,’ and its antithesis, ‘stepping outside the box.’ In my generation (the infamous Genz), we consider the term “living inside a box” as a confinement of one’s ability to live life as they would prefer to—in other words, living a life according to other’s expectations for you.

Four sides of the box represent different conditions in life that together mold you in a space void of individuality and freedom: the notorious box— invisible to naked eyes but triggering to desperate souls. Are you living inside “the box”?

Ask yourself these questions:

1. Are you functioning according to someone’s else expectations for you?

2. Or are you functioning according to what you think they think of you?

It might sound confusing to comprehend the second question; however, read that out loud. again. and again. Make sense yet?

Most of the times, people around you (your family, friends, significant others, teacher, employer, etc.) explicitly and implicitly set some standards for you to follow. Those standards are the box that is being drawn for you. They subconsciously guide you how to act and push you to walk within the surface area of it. You can’t go out of it as the box has turned into your comfort zone, your play-it-safe zone.

Occasionally, you will get tired of checking those boxes, restless and thirsting for a change. You feel the frustration and the starvation for freedom. However, pushing outside of the box makes you feel your heart drumming, your stomach fluttering, your adrenaline rushing, but your brain hesitating: Second thought…should I turn back, or should I say ‘fck this’ and go for it? The term for ‘fck this and go for it’ is called ‘stepping outside of your comfort zone’ a.k.a ‘stepping outside the box.’

Now come the complicated part. Living according to what you think they think of you. Let’s dissect the question.

what ‘you think’ ‘they think’ of you.

We know that people have expectations for you. We, ourselves, tend to expect others to be this and be that too. However, we can be overthinking by convincing ourselves to believe that other’s might be expecting something from you. They didn’t tell you that, or they might be doing something out of ordinary that cause you to overthink the situation—in short, you assume.

You assume that they want 1, 2 ,3 from a small shift in reaction towards your behavior. For example, you told your parents you wanted to be an artist. At that moment, your father stayed silent, and your mother gave your father a quick look. Suddenly, you assume that they dislike your decision, and you are disappointed. The next day, you will find yourself trying to justify your decision towards your parents even though they haven’t mentioned anything obvious.

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Blog arts credit to @Daniela Sherer